Thursday, April 15, 2010

chapter one... and two.


My patient (whom I would refer to as P from this point on) has become a Christian!

It's been a year now since I've been doing my secret research, trying to hide from the other devils, lest they mock me of the penalties for my "incompetence." Uncle (or rather, Master) Screwtape was gravely displeased but has assured me, nonetheless, that there is still hope because P's new habits are still "in progress."

I am still learning the art of temptation and I have failed miserably in teaching/persuading P. He thinks he's giving the Enemy a favor through repentance and accepting the Enemy's lordship in his life. He's still skeptical and he still avoids some of his neighbors as if they were lepers but the funny thing is, he now goes to their church!

P's singing their songs, not really minding when he goes a little out of tune, and he's convinced it's the Enemy (whom he calls Father God) who is most pleased with the changes he's currently doing (which, he considers sacrifices.)

I'm seriously thinking whether an apprentice devil such as myself can possibly be converted - considering the circumstances. P's church says the Enemy makes all things possible, even quoting words from what Uncle Screwtape calls the "shiny little book" of letter G which I think stands for "God." But it's actually spelled l-i-t-u-r-g-y. Anyhow, Uncle doesn't know that my thoughts of conversion were what caused me to be lax in polishing my tactics of temptation on P.

Several months before P's conversion, I was taking good care that he saw a good deal of his materialist friend. P's quite accustomed to a dozen of incompatible philosophies and it didn't bother him whether or not materialism was true. He knew it to be practical and Master Screwtape advised me - as much as possible - not to stir arguments in his mind which would divert him from the tyrrany of the urgent or the 'stream' and make him turn to more universal issues.

I am a 'pure' spirit and this is what Master Screwtape calls as the Enemy's advantage for He has been human. Now, that boggled me. The Enemy, whom humans call God the Father has the advantage of having been human, whereas our father below hasn't, and that gives this God advantage?

I've been understanding that humans find it impossible to believe the unfamiliar when they are beset with the ordinariness of things. I tried to use economics and sociology - the 'safer' sciences - to discredit Christianity but Master Screwtape said it was best to keep science away from P as much as possible because the real sciences will only positively encourage him to think about realities he can't touch and see.

Anyhow, with my own confusion and curiosity, I continued my little research and was starting to be convinced that conversion might also be possible for me. That diverted me from P and before I knew it, he became a Christian.

My apprenticeship is ongoing and it is my forsaken duty to keep P in the thought that the Enemy owes him something for his conversion; that he is actually entitled to rewards for all the present "dying to self" that he's been doing. His pride would lead him to fall back to his old ways sooner than later.

But why am I not convinced?

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

chapter one.

WORMWOOD: How can I 'think aloud' when Toadpipe is always watching my back?!

Monday, January 12, 2009

the preface


"There are two equal and opposite errors into which our race can fall about the devils. One is to disbelieve in their existence. The other is to believe, and to feel an excessive and unhealthy interest in them. They themselves are equally pleased by both errors and hail a materialist or a magician with the same delight." -C.S. Lewis

I cannot understand why devils are equally pleased by those two extremes and how I, an apprentice devil, am supposed to "hail a materialist or a magician with the same delight." I have heard though that there is a God who sees everything that we do and who is in total control of everything.

I have heard that "such God" reigns supreme -- even over Master Screwtape's deceptive schemes which I am still in the process of learning. I really wonder.. if "such God" really exists, I might as well be cautious of everything that Toadpipe feeds me. As Mr. Lewis has warned his would-be readers, "Not everything that Screwtape says should be assumed to be true even from his own angle."

I would like to believe that although Master Screwtape can invade anyone's thought realm, twist Scripture and manipulate circumstances, he cannot read minds. And so with utmost care (and fear) I now begin my quest for the Truth and pray (if it is true that "such God" answers prayers) that Master Screwtape doesn't find out about my 'secret' research. Not now.

Friday, January 2, 2009

tempters' training college

from fpa theatre company photo gallery

the "invitation" is just too tempting to pass up..

i am devoting this blog to my personal study of C.S. Lewis' 'The Screwtape Letters.' my interest in theatre and things philosophical (spiritual?) dates back to my pre-teen years and though i have never really come around it to the hilt, i must say, this is part of my calling.

this is something which has taken hold of me and which i have chosen to succumb to.

i run for cover before proceeding and as i slip into the shoes of wormwood, i endeavor to take every step and peruse every line with utmost caution.